Alright folks, buckle up because I actually went and threw one of those silly Spankers parties the other weekend. Figured I might as well try something totally out of my comfort zone, you know? Kept it small though, just a handful of close friends who wouldn’t judge me too hard if it flopped.
Getting The Stuff Together Was Half The Battle
First things first, I needed the actual spanking tools. Didn’t wanna spend a fortune, obviously. Hit up a couple of those party supply stores downtown. You know the ones, crammed full of random junk. Found some bright pink plastic paddles near the bachelor/bachelorette stuff – figured those would do the trick. Grabbed a few cheap fly swatters too, ’cause why not? Looked utterly ridiculous, but that was kinda the point.
Food was next. Knew people would wanna drink, so snacks were crucial. Kept it stupid simple:
- A giant bowl of chips and pretzels (the salty kind, gotta balance the booze).
- Some super basic dip (store-bought salsa, saved me so much time).
- A big platter of cookies (bakery section for the win, zero baking skills required).
- Plenty of cheap beer and soda (ice-filled coolers, nothing fancy).
Forgot to buy ice initially. Classic me move. Had to run back out last minute.
Setting Up My Tiny Place
My living room isn’t exactly a ballroom. Had to shove the coffee table against the wall and basically clear the whole middle of the floor. Threw down a ratty old rug I had – figured it could take the beating. Put the snack table in the corner, drinks near the door. Blasted some upbeat, silly music kinda loud to cover any awkward silences. Turned down the main lights, left a couple of lamps on. Didn’t need mood lighting, just needed people to not trip over my stuff.
The Party Actually Started… And People Played Along!
Honestly, when the first few friends arrived, it felt super awkward handing them a pink paddle. Like, “Um, here’s your whacking implement?” Got a lot of raised eyebrows and nervous giggles. We stood around the snacks for a solid 20 minutes drinking beers, everyone eyeing those paddles on the table.
Finally, my buddy Dave (bless him) grabbed one and lightly whacked my arm. “Is this how it’s done?” That broke the ice. Next thing you know, it turned into this chaotic, giggly mess. People were chasing each other gently with the fly swatters, giving totally fake “spanks” on the butt like we were kids playing tag. Mostly just a lot of laughing and weirdly bopping each other on the shoulders. One of the cheap plastic spankers broke almost immediately, which just made everyone laugh harder.
The weirdest part? The snacks were the real star. People huddled around that chip bowl like it was the campfire. Beer flowed, music kept going, and the actual “spanking” bits were just random, goofy moments in between hanging out. No one cared about rules or taking it seriously.
Cleanup Was Surprisingly Easy
After a couple hours, people drifted off. Mostly just a bunch of empty beer bottles and crumpled chip bags. Tossed the broken paddle and the fly swatters (they were basically wrecked). Vacuumed up crumbs from the rug. Took me all of maybe 15 minutes. Way less messy than I feared.
Honest Takeaway?
It was silly. Completely ridiculous. Felt awkward setting it up and starting it. But you know what? People got a kick out of the sheer absurdity of holding a bright pink paddle. It was less about the actual spanking and more about having a dumb, lighthearted excuse to get together, act like goofballs, and eat junk food. Would I do it again? Probably not anytime soon. But it was definitely a weird but fun experiment that cost me next to nothing. And hey, now I can say I did it! Just keep the snacks stocked and your expectations low.
